Understanding Abuse in Romantic Relationships: Part 2

About 5 years ago, a renowned gospel singer from my hometown lost her life to domestic violence. The husband would eventually get sentenced to life imprisonment. Of course, their children are now without a mother or a father, carrying trauma that will be part of their existence for the rest of their lives. The death of this gospel artist sparked not just an awareness (of what could happen behind closed doors in some religious homes), but a movement that inspired many to summon the courage to not just speak up but leave.

Understanding Abuse in Romantic Relationships: Part 1

A lot of people confuse abuse with human imperfection. But there’s a difference between somebody having a rough day, being human, or making an honest mistake versus somebody choosing to be abusive. A person dealing with their own issues may unintentionally hurt you, apologize sincerely, and work to grow. An abusive person uses harm as a weapon, then keeps repeating the behavior without true accountability, remorse, or change.

Tempering Discipline With Mercy: Raising Kids to Be Responsible, Not Rebellious

Raising children is one of the most rewarding yet challenging responsibilities a parent can have. Every parent wants to instill responsibility, integrity, and respect in their children, but how we go about it makes all the difference. Too much discipline without love can lead to rebellion, while too much leniency without accountability can breed irresponsibility. The key is balance. Discipline tempered with mercy.

Navigating the Debilitating Effects of Anxiety and Panic Attacks

Anxiety and panic attacks can feel like drowning in a sea of overwhelming fear, with no shore in sight. Millions of people struggle with these conditions daily, affecting their ability to function at work, relationships, and personal well-being. According to the National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH), nearly 31% of U.S. adults experience an anxiety disorder at some point in their lives.

Is My Therapist My Sounding Board?

In today’s fast-paced world, therapy has become more accessible as an essential tool for personal growth and emotional well-being. But as therapy becomes more mainstream, many people wonder, “ Is my therapist just a sounding board?”

Chidi Hezkiah, LPC, LADCMH, IAADC, ADSAC AssessorJuly 20, 2024Therapy, Therapist

Communication: What Has Emotional Intelligence Got to Do with It?

Have you ever walked away from a conversation feeling frustrated, unheard, or dismissed? Maybe the entire conversation revolved around the other person, leaving no room for your thoughts or feelings. You might have entered the conversation feeling happy and excited, only to leave feeling drained and unappreciated. These experiences highlight the subtle but crucial role that emotional intelligence plays in communication.

Anniversary Grief Response: Navigating Grief Anniversaries with Resilience and Healing

It is that time of the year. Kenneth is beginning to experience overwhelming emotions that do not make sense to him. There have been no recent changes in his life, and the world around him remains unremarkable. Nevertheless, the past few days have been difficult. He barely gets good sleep at night.

Winter Blues: Simple & Realistic Ways to Tackle Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD)

Winter is here, and so is SAD, a form of depression that affects millions every year as the Fall transitions to Winter. Sadness, crying spells, irritability, low/no energy…

Trusting Again When Trust is Broken

Trust issues or mistrust usually occur when there has been betrayal, abandonment, rejection, or deception. The more experiences of betrayal, the more difficult it becomes to trust not just the person who betrayed or hurt you but others who might mean well.

Forgiveness and Reconciliation: Are they the Same?

Forgiveness and reconciliation are two different things. While you don’t necessarily have to reconcile after you have forgiven, reconciliation requires forgiveness.

How Do You Forgive When You’ve Been Hurt So Bad?

Forgiveness is quite a complex concept, easy to say but hard to do. It can be very difficult to forgive when we have been betrayed, abused, or hurt so badly.

Finding Hope Amidst Loss and Grief

The loss of a loved one can create a vacuum in our hearts. Although the last thing in our mind when we have just lost someone dear to us, is hope, yet hope forms the basis on which we envision the possibility of recovery after a devastating or tragic event. The thing is, every one of us will experience loss and grief at a given point or several occasions in our lives.

Chidi Hezkiah, LPC, LADCMH, IAADC, ADSAC AssessorJanuary 8, 2021Grief. Recovery. Loss, Grief, Hope

Healing from Loss and Grief

One thing to keep in mind while grieving is the fact that healing looks different for everyone. While some might heal faster, others might take longer to recover from the devastating effect of loss and grief. To one, healing might mean remembering our loved one and smiling again. On the other hand, it might mean feeling a sense of relief from the overwhelming emotions experienced by another.

The Grieving Process

I remember this feeling vividly when my sister passed away. We were on the phone when the call suddenly dropped. I later found out a truck had crashed into the bus she was traveling in. She was one of two people who died at the scene. I waited for her to call me back, as she always did, but she never did. When I got the news, I felt frozen in shock, unable to process what had happened.

Grief Responses: Understanding the Body’s Response to Loss

Losing a loved one can be devastating and challenging. With grief come specific changes in our body that we might not fully understand or control. These changes can be emotional, cognitive, behavioral, spiritual, physical, and sometimes overwhelming and confusing. Various factors can impact the intensity and length of the grief we experience, including but not limited to our relationship with the deceased loved one, personality types, belief system, support system, etc.

Understanding the Different Types of Grief

When we lose something or someone we love dearly, the pain manifests in our body through grief. Thus grief is the emotional, physical, cognitive, or spiritual response to losing someone dear to our heart or something we attach great importance to.

Chidi Hezkiah, LPC, LADCMH, IAADC, ADSAC AssessorOctober 25, 2020Grief. Recovery. Loss

Grounding Skills for Anxiety

I notice the common denominator of these definitions and descriptions of anxiety is the Unknown/not knowing. Anxiety deprives us of the ability to dwell and enjoy the present and what is happening around us, here and now, TODAY….

Punishment vs. Discipline: Understanding the Difference

Punishment and Discipline are tools that parents use to elicit an expected behavior in their child, or to achieve a certain purpose in their parenting. Do punishment and discipline mean the same thing?

Who Am I to My Child: A Friend or a Parent?

Who am I to my child? Their friend or their parent? This is one question every parent would ask themselves multiple times over their child’s various stages of development. This question drives the way we relate with our children from birth to adulthood.

Chidi Hezkiah, LPC, LADCMH, IAADC, ADSAC AssessorJune 4, 2019Discipline, Parenting

The Complete Guide to ADSAC and DUI Requirements in Oklahoma

Being arrested for a DUI, DWI, APC, DUID, Open-Container, or other alcohol or drug-related driving offense in Oklahoma can leave you with a lot of questions and uncertainty. Between court appearances, driver's license issues, fines, and state requirements, it can be difficult to know where to begin.

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